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What is true #forgiveness & what is the cost of #unforgiveness ?


Hello 
Thank you for stopping by. I had a personal breakthrough in the last week or so & am keen to share. 
To those who have been following my blog, you may recall my testimony a few weeks back. I do believe that my inability to fully forgive my parent’s has held me back not only in my journey with God, it is also stopping me from being & living freely. I struggle with triggers from time to time & this pose an immense amount of frustration in me that once again I go back to my original thinking, how can you forgive such impact where it’s had such an adverse effect? 

In short- I understand the principles of forgiveness but it wasn’t in my heart. I can only imagine it got harden as the years past, to survive and not be broken by this. Whilst it would appear I am getting on with life, the foundations of my mind, spirit & soul is weak so much so it can break at any time. The reality of life is hard enough as it is, without the baggage of the past. 

A Facebook thread on forgiveness caught my eye, one post in particular echoed my own thoughts, as above. I note that forgiveness is for yourself to be released from the very things or people that is causing you distress-T.D Jakes. However I still struggled with this in practice, until I read another post, the line that resonated was ‘forgiveness is the process that changes you from a victim to a survivor. 

This seems to tide in the stories that has been featured on the TD Jakes Show & Steve Harvey Show, which I wrote about previously. The common threads in forgiveness are, letting go of the past, being in the present & therefore making better tomorrows for generations to come. I can now see if we don’t forgive or let go past hurt & disappointments it can only hurt our own future & probably for more generations to come because the hurt will became bitterness, hatred & anger. Nothing ever good is associated with having these feelings, as it tends to suppress our zest for life,  more so weight you down overtime. Personally it has only been the last year or so that I felt totally free in body, spirit, mind & soul. From experience when you feel better, you live better, you do better & most of all you love better. 

In a biblical sense, if we don’t forgive the stronghold can only get stronger and therefore it’s likely to continue to impact for generations to come, as the saying goes it’s hard to bring up a child but it’s even harder to fix a broken child- unknown. I also had a major breakthrough in my journey with you Lord about forgiveness, we should forgive others as God forgave us. Even when we seemingly getting on with life, the memory still lives within us & it can manifest into something else as I have found. A physical situation can cease but in our minds, we can relive the pain indefinitely and that is the ultimate price we pay for un-forgiveness.   

After almost a year of discussions and reading my heart has started to soften to allow my pain to be healed. Forgiveness means to me letting go of the pain because I believe my future is going to be bigger than my past. It doesn’t change the past but it changes my present, my future & ultimately the destiny of future generations. It’s hard to accept the reality but it’s going to be even harder to destine my daughter to be subjected too much of the same failures of parenting. A consistent theme I have read that as humans we are conditioned by our environment, at the same time we can be reconditioned through self-love & learning new ways of being. In the words of TD Jakes, you cannot reach your destiny, with your history in your hand. 

Best wishes

KIMI x 

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